Tony12138 楼主
10-31
托福作文咩第 28 期 Day 2
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#托福作文咩第 28 期 Day 2# 【作业一】
For instance, as a young man, travelling by myself will give me the freedom of arranging a compact schedule. By myself, I can go to a lot of places in one day, visiting all the places a want to visit in the city. But with my parents, walking for 5 minutes and stopping for 10 seems like the only option.
【作业二】
I prefer travelling at a young age. Travelling requires good body conditions. For instance, as a fit young man, travelling by myself will give me the freedom of arranging a compact schedule. By myself, I can go to a lot of places in one day, visiting all the places a want to visit in the city. But with my parents, walking for 5 minutes and stopping for 10 seems like the only option. Walking non-stop clearly needs good stamina and body conditions, which isn't a common feature among older people. The older you get, probably the worse your body will get, since health is a major factor of a fun trip, I think we shouldn't waste our time and wait for our body to get worse and then travel.

【作业三】
1. Although travelling abroad is a lot of fun, it will consume both physical and mental power.
2. Interesting as it is, traveling abroad need consumption of both physical and mental power.
2017-10-31 23:02:59 来自 托福作文咩
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1 楼
1. 有逻辑
    有主题,但是和题目有些偏离

2.语法  没有问题

3.用词

今天一个很大的问题:今天的要求是出国旅行需要很好的身体素质,你的例子没有很好切合主题,有些偏题了。

建议:再看一下任务卡的要求,思考一下

但是用词语法方面没有问题😊

2017-10-31 23:17
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2 楼
评论 1 楼: 谢谢
2017-10-31 23:19
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我有话要说
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【作业一、二】[br]出国旅游的前提之一是你的身体要好。毕竟,出国虽然好玩儿,但很耗费体力和精力。年轻人,精力旺盛,他们能够有更多的机会去接触新奇、有趣的事物,与老年人相比。比如,当我的舅舅和姥姥去年去泰国玩的时候,我的舅舅潜水、爬山等玩得很尽兴,而我的姥姥只是坐在岸边,注视着周围的风景。有时她甚至不得不在酒店里待一整天。从这个角度来讲,我坚持这一点当我们还年轻的时候出去旅游要比年老体衰时出去玩更明智。[br]【作业三】[br]1.Although traveling abroad will be of great fun, it will consume strength and energy.[br]2.Interesting as it is, traveling to other countries will need consumption of physical and mental activities.[br]【作业四】[br]One of the preconditions of Traveling to foreign countries is that you are healthy. After all, interesting as it is, traveling abroad will consume strength and energy. Being full of energy, the young may have more chance to embrace exotic and interesting things than the old. For example, when my uncle and my grandmother went to the Thailand last year, my uncle enjoyed diving and climbing,while what my grandma did was just sitting on the beach and watched beautiful scenery around her. Sometimes, she even had to stay in the hotel for the whole day. From the angle, I insist the view that taking a trip abroad when we are still young is wiser than does that while we become old and senile.
【1】今年,我姐姐和父母去瑞士旅游。安排了很多行程,姐姐可以玩滑雪、蹦极之类的活动,而父母只能欣赏风景,拍照,并且常常下午就得休息。[br]【2】其次,出国旅游需要好的身体。出国旅游虽然很好玩儿,但是也很耗费体力和精力。年轻时体力好可以好好玩,年纪大了出去旅游就不太方便。今年,我姐姐和父母去瑞士旅游。安排了很多行程,姐姐可以玩滑雪、蹦极之类的活动,而父母只能欣赏风景,拍照,并且常常下午就得休息。我自己就比较喜欢一些有挑战性的活动,如果年轻时出国,可以好好的尝试,要是等到五六十岁再出国,可能身体和精力就不能负担得起,所以我喜欢年轻时候出国旅游。[br]【3】Although travle abroad is of great fun, it will consume physical strength and energy.[br] Interesting as it is, it will need consumption of physical strength and energy.[br]【4】What is more, a great heath body is required to travel out. Interesting as it is, it will need consumption of physical strength and energy. That is a sample matter when we were young, but a huge block on the way of the old. For instance, my sister went to America with my parents this summer, and they made a full schedule to enjoy themselves before they realised my mom and dad could not keep up with her steps. Because my parents always haven been to get a break at afternoon to fulfill themselves when my sister was skinning or shopping. To me, I like those challenging activities, and I will have a try to travel abroad when I was young. Unfortunately, the old can not catch their dreams due to low-level heath condition. That why I support my standpoint above.
【作业一】[br]为什么出国旅游需要好的身体,请举出一个相关的例子。[br]有一次 我去澳洲玩,本来计划了有潜水观看海洋动物的,但是因为我妈妈身体的问题,不能去潜水,我也只能选择坐船游览风光。 [br]【作业二】[br]请结合观点、理由,以及你写的例子,仿照上述理由段重写一个理由段,说明为什么出国旅游需要好的身体。[br]出国旅游需要好的身体。国有一些娱乐项目比较特别,对身体状况有严格的要求。年轻时身体好才能玩,老了去玩可能会有危险。有一次,我去澳洲玩,本来计划了有潜水观看海洋动物的,但是因为我妈妈身体的不好,导游建议我们不去潜水,我也只能选择坐玻璃底船看海样动物。如果我妈在年轻十岁,我们就能去潜水啦。[br]【作业三】[br]请分别用下列句型翻译这句话:出国旅游虽然好玩儿,但是也很耗费体力和精力。[br]Although traveling abroad can be of great fun, it will consume strength and energy[br]Interesting as it is, traveling abroad will need consumption of strength and energy[br]【作业四】[br]请将你在作业二中写的理由段翻译成英文。[br]Traveling abroad needs to be very healthy. Some foreign entertainment facilities are very special, it may have a strict requirement for your strength and energy. Young people in good health can enjoy it, while the older may be dangerous when doing it. Once I went to A with my mom. We did have a plan to go under water and see the wild marine life. Our guide, however, suggested us not to go, because of my mom’s body is so good. We changed the plan and went to take the boat with a glass on the hull. We could go diving if mom was ten years younger. [br]
【作文题目】[br]Which do you prefer? Travel to foreign countries when you are young or when you are older. Give specific reasons or examples to support your decision. [br]【观点】[br]我更喜欢在年轻的时候出国旅游。[br]【作业一】[br]为什么出国旅游需要好的身体,请举出一个相关的例子。[br]出国旅游为了省钱,都会一下去很多个景点。[br]【作业二】[br]请结合观点、理由,以及你写的例子,仿照上述理由段重写一个理由段,说明为什么出国旅游需要好的身体。[br]观点:出国旅游为了省钱,都会一下去很多个景点。[br]理由:如果我们没有一个好的身体,我们没有办法去那么多的景点,也就完成不了我们的行程。[br]例子:这让我想起来了,我的奶奶有一次跟我们一起去日本,我们去爬富士山,富士山(mount Fuji)上的景色非常地漂亮,但是由于奶奶的身体不好,没有办法爬山,所以也就错过了这样的景色,最后只能够听我们说这个景色有多漂亮。[br]【作业三】[br]请分别用下列句型翻译这句话:出国旅游虽然好玩儿,但是也很耗费体力和精力。[br]1.Although A be of great fun, it will consume B and C.[br]2.Interesting as it is, A will need consumption of B and C.[br]Although traveling abroad is of great fun, it will consume both energy and stamina.[br]Interesting as it is, traveling abroad will need consumption of energy and stamina.[br]【作业四】[br]请将你在作业二中写的理由段翻译成英文。[br]Since we are likely to save as much money as we can, our schedule will be relatively busy. Thus, if we cannot have an enough strong body, we cannot see so many landscapes in such few days, leading failure to fulfill our busy schedule. In addition, owing to lack of a strong body, we will have no energy and stamina to travel some extremely beautiful but dangerous views. For instance, it does remind me of an unforgettable experience with my grandma in Mount Fuji, a beautiful mountain in Japan. My grandma is almost 80 years old and climbing Mount Fuji is too difficult for her so that she can only be told by us how beautiful at the peak of the mountain but she cannot feel it in person.[br][br]
例子:高考结束,爸爸决定带着我,妈妈和奶奶一同去日本游玩,在飞行的途中奶奶一直觉得心脏很不舒服,颠簸的飞行环境使她疲惫不堪,因而即使到了旅行的目的奶奶也感到十分的疲倦无法,真正享受旅行的快乐。[br]理由:出国旅游需要一个好的身体,通常来说,出国旅游会选择交通方式会是飞机,而这样却又会面临长达数十小时的飞行。无疑,这对于老人来说是一次巨大的挑战。高考结束,爸爸决定带着我,妈妈和奶奶一同去日本游玩,在飞行的途中奶奶一直觉得心脏很不舒服,颠簸的飞行环境使她疲惫不堪,因而即使到了旅行的目的奶奶也感到十分的疲倦无法,真正享受旅行的快乐。[br]Although traveling abroad is of great fun,It will consume physical strength and energy.[br]Interesting as it is, Traveling abroad will need consumption of Physical strength and energy.[br]Traveling abroad needs a good body. Generally speaking, the mode of transportation that travel abroad will choose is the airplane. And that could lead to dozens of hours of flight. There is no doubt that this is often a great challenge for the elderly body. After the college entrance examination, my whole family including grandma went to Japan .Then on the flight grandma has been feeling very uncomfortable with her heart. At the same time, the bumpy flight environment is also he felt a fatigue. So even if grandma reaches her destination, she won't be able to enjoy the trip.

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